Andrew and I made the decision that we wanted to have children. We actually talked about it earlier in our relationship. We wanted to make sure we were both on the same page there is no sense in spending your life with someone if you want kids and they don't. This decision wasn't reached easily. So many conversations, and questions asked. Were we financially stable enough? Are we really ready? Have we purchased everything we want? It's so much harder to buy things for yourself when you have another mouth to feed and body to clothe. We were going to be good parents? When we were satisfied with our answers to these questions, we made the decision to start trying to conceive and pray hard for the gift of life.
The task of trying to conceive is the best part, I think. But at the same time the most stressful. The waiting is EXCRUCIATING! I am simply NOT a patient person, and this just proved it even more. One morning after we hard started 'trying' - Andrew came out to the kitchen and said to me ... "Now baby, you know that it takes healthy couples anywhere between 5 & 6 months to conceive?!" I just glared at him and said .... "Go to work!" Now, realistically I knew it could take that long, but mentally I wasn't prepared for that. I wanted a baby and wanted one NOW! I am a typical women in that respect. Once I set my sights on something, I will do what it takes to get it. So, trying to swallow the fact that it might not happen the first try was difficult to say the least.
Well the fertile period came and went, so now it's time to play the waiting game. If I didn't make it clear before, I am not good at waiting. I had to wait 2 weeks before we would know. Have you ever sat and thought how long that is? It's really not THAT bad, but for me - it was like an eternity. I tried to do things to keep myself busy, running errands, working out, cleaning house....anything I could do that would make me forget that I 'could' be pregnant and make time go by faster.
After two weeks of waiting, the morning came that I would have gotten my visit from my 'monthly friend'. No sign of it! Not that means anything because my periods were anything but regular. It's not like you could set a clock to mine, so that wasn't very reassuring, but it did make me a little giddy, I'll be honest. I made the decision to go ahead and test, I needed to know! So, I snuck into the bathroom, quietly opened a pregnancy test, read the directions and decided - it was time!
I holed myself up in the bathroom and waited. Any other time I could pee on command, but NOT today ... of course! Finally I pee'd on the stick, capped the test and stuck it on the counter and crawled into my closet. I am not exaggerating one bit. I am that silly! I sat on the floor in my closet. I decided, this is a good time to pray. So my prayer went something like this ... "God, I pray that if this test comes up negative, that I don't get disappointed and that I stay positive. I don't know why I am freaking out. I am SO young and have plenty of time to get pregnant. BUT, it would be really cool if I was! I pray that I make healthy decisions for myself and my child." This isn't verbatim remind you, but the basics are there.
The test directions said wait 3 minutes, I gave it 6, just in case. So then I peeled myself off the floor and thought ... "Just do it. Rip the band-aid off. We need to know!" After taking a deep breath, I walked out and looked in the mirror. I wanted to see the look on my face before I looked down. I have never looked so scared and excited at the same time. Here we go ... the moment of truth. "LOOK down silly! Just do it!" I was thinking and glanced down at the test. I bought the test that had the fancy digital read out. I did this for one reason - so that it would be almost impossible to misread it. :) I like to make it simple. When I looked down the test screen said - PREGNANT! "Wait a minute!", I thought. This can't be right. Okay, I will give it a few more seconds and wait for the NOT to pop up. I literally stared at this pregnancy test for 15 seconds. What am I doing?! I was in disbelief. At that moment I dropped to my knees, started crying and laughing and thanking God all at the same time. What an amazing moment!
Now, do I tell Andrew or wait. Oh who am I kiddin', I can't keep secrets. So I decide to wake him up and tell him. (Looking back, I wish I would have waited and done something cute - maybe next time.) So I go into the bedroom - he's sleeping mind you - and snuggled up next to him and asked him "Hey baby, what are you doing?" DUMB question, it's obvious he's sleeping! His response ... "I am sleeping!" - in a sleepy voice. My thoughts were a picture of me smacking myself on the forehead saying "Well duh!" and shaking my head at my stupid question. So I say back to him "Oh, well that's cool 'cause I am pregnant!" What an awesome way to tell him. :rollseyes: I really couldn't come up with anything better at the time. Ahh well. Cat is out of the bag now! So he's not exactly awake, but that probably pulled him out of his sleepy state just a bit. He turns his head towards me and says "Good baby!" like he was praising the dog for doing it's business outside. Very puzzled, I was thinking "I said I AM PREGNANT!" - almost demanding a better response for my half-dead/asleep husband. I mean c'mon, what was I really expecting here. Then he asks, "Did you take a test?!" "Well of course!", I said. "Can I see it?" he asked. "What, do you not believe me!" I told him. But I know why he wanted to see it, he wanted the same realization and feeling that I got when I looked down and saw the word - PREGNANT. :)
Later that morning Andrew says to me "We made a baby!" How freakin' cute is that?! We were both very excited and after all that worrying, it happened on the FIRST try! It just goes to show that the power of prayer really does work!
Our life has been full of so many great moments so far and I anxiously await the upcoming ones. On March 24th, 2007 - Andrew asked me to marry him. April 19th, 2008 - we said "I do!" and I took his last name. January 8th, 2009 - we closed on our house and June 2nd, 2009 - we made a baby! :) Looking forward to many more special dates in our lives together.
